Being deployed can be tough business. While you’re busy hookin’ and jabbin’ (ah-punchin’ and ah-stabbin’) overseas, concern is ever-present that the infamous, devious snake called Jody might slither his way into the affections of your gal back home.

Sure, you met your wife at Applebee’s just nine days before you deployed, but your marriage is as rock solid as those private first class chevrons you just pinned on.

Despite such concrete relational foundations, however, Jody’s back-home conquest of relationship-demolishing chicanery has coexisted alongside far-flung military deployments throughout all of human history.